….One of the most difficult aspects of widowhood to adapt to was getting my head around the fact that I was alone, again. Totally alone. Not living with parents or child, but completely alone in a very quiet house. It’s odd how twenty years of being part of a couple could make me forget the “separateness” of my existence in the single state of my twenties and thirties. I was a mom by then, but as an adult, I was a single, independent, individual, and always had been. My new state of singleness is very different in some ways: I have been loved, appreciated, and joined with someone whom I loved equally, and that changed me from the never-married single mindset to a person who had successfully joined with a partner. I also know I’m capable of being married, of being a good wife, and in my pre-marriage single years, I feared I’d be a failure at the experience. Marriage takes compromise, sacrifice, understanding, and lots of work to keep things on an even keel, and unmarried, opinionated, independent me wasn’t sure I could hack it. But I did. We did. So here I am, a pro at marriage, the product of a good marriage, but suddenly, sadly, single…
