AKA "The Writing Woman"
Would one more time have helped?
I am once again swamped with regrets for the times I was too wrapped up in other activities (or my exhaustion or sadness and despair) to drop everything and come to you, join you as you lay in bed. But would one more time, one more embrace, one more talk have helped assuage this … Read the blog
Dear Rick,
How could I so easily forget the one place that has so much meaning, the place that would be so difficult to return to without you?
Home Depot was a huge part of our marriage. It started at Lester’s, when we were planning to buy his house on land contract. We put a lot of work into that … Read the blog
Rick has been gone three months. In the past two days, I made it through three firsts: I went to get biopsy results alone (uterine cancer scare), I celebrated my birthday, and, of course, Thanksgiving. I have so many things to be thankful for: the biopsy results were good, and my family and friends were supportive and wonderful on my … Read the blog
Thoughts on my birthday.
I’m feeling so much love from my family and friends. I couldn’t make it without their support.
I went alone to get my biopsy results. It was lonely, sitting there all by myself in the doctor’s examining room, waiting to find out if the biopsy results were negative. Rick was always by my side for all … Read the blog
Dear Rick,
Matt stopped by my desk to discuss hot sauce. He mentioned remembering that Brandon had been saving Taco Bell taco sauce packets at one time.
Wow….remember when Brandon saved hot sauce packets and put them in a giant box and wrapped and gave it to you for Christmas? God, that was funny. You were genuinely thrilled to receive … Read the blog
Sausage biscuits and bananas…
The Alexa shopping list still has items I was going to buy for Rick.
Fourteen weeks ago, he died.
November 19, 2017
… Read the blogDear Rick,
When using the broken vase analogy, my counselor said to pick out some beautiful pieces and make a mosaic.
I think of that often, as I try to decide what to take from our marriage on my new solo journey – my very painful foray into the future without you.
It’s work-at-home Friday. I toiled all morning on … Read the blog
I won an award at work today and you weren’t here to share the joy with me. You were here when I found out I was being nominated. I just assumed you’d be here to find out if I won.
I’ll use the money toward the MacBook you insisted I need. You were planning to buy it for our anniversary … Read the blog
I went for minor surgery without Rick yesterday. He was always by my side, even in the doctor’s office when discussing the procedures or issues. He drove me, sat with me, took me for lunch somewhere to celebrate the fact that I had done whatever was required despite my negative feelings about anything to do with doctoring or medicine. I’ve … Read the blog
I had another slight meltdown today after Lynn left. I didn’t feel like doing anything except sitting in my Rick blanket cocoon. I guess it was because I spent the entire day until 1:30am with others and didn’t have any time to cry.
I thought of Rick several times yesterday. In the movies, he was always next to me. We … Read the blog