This is what it feels like

I was driving home in a thunderstorm and this song came on the radio. This is why I can’t listen to music for awhile.

“This Is What It Feels Like”
(Armin van Buuren feat. Trevor Guthrie)

Nobody here knocking at my door
The sound of silence I can’t take anymore
Nobody ringing my telephone now
Oh how I miss such a beautiful sound

[Chorus:]
And I don’t even know how I survive
I won’t make it to the shore without your light
No I don’t even know if I’m alive
Oh, oh, oh without you now
This is what it feels like

Nothing to hold but the memories and frames
Oh they remind me of the battle I face
without your love, without you I drown
Somebody save me I’m going down

[Chorus:]
And I don’t even know how I survive
I won’t make it to the shore without your light
No I don’t even know if I’m alive
Oh, oh, oh without you now
This is what it feels like

[Chorus:]
And I don’t even know how I survive
I won’t make it down the road with one headlight
No I don’t even know if I’m alive
Oh, oh, oh without you now
This is what it feels like

About the author

Katherine Billings Palmer is a technical writer, poet, and essayist from Garden City, Michigan. She’s won several academic writing awards, including first place in the University of Michigan Dearborn Critical Essay Contest for her work about poet John Donne: “‘The Sun Rising’: A Lover’s Boast.”

In 2017, Katherine’s husband, Rick, died of complications from small cell lung cancer. She wrote a series of poems and essays about her struggles to cope with her grief. I Wanted to Grow Old With You is available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle editions.

Her latest book, A Widow’s Words: Grief, Reflection, Prose, and Poetry – The First Year was published in January 2019 and is also available on Amazon.com.

Katherine is a guest blogger for the Hope for Widows Foundation and writes about her grief journey at www.TheWritingWidow.com.

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