Our House – the song

Our House
Crosby, Stills & Nash, 1970

I heard this song on the radio yesterday. Of course, I cried. I remember dancing with you in the kitchen when the song came on. I was so happy that we had our perfect life in our perfect house.

But then I remembered earlier, before we met. I remember in the 70s and 80s hearing this song and having such a longing for the picturesque and romantic life described by these lyrics. I wanted this so badly – to be loved by a man and to live happily with that man who loved me.

And it happened. I found this bliss I sought for so many years.

Yes, it’s over. But I HAD it. How many people never did? How easily it could have passed me by. Instead of being a widow mourning her loss, I could be a still single old maid, who’d never enjoyed those fantastic, beautiful, wonderful years with you.

Maryland seems like a dream now. The house, the toiling, the beauty that resulted from our very, very hard work. I remember sitting in the family room, by the fireplace we built – we didn’t have long. Not long after the work was done, we sold the house and moved on. But we enjoyed the kitchen and the family room for more than a year.

And the yard, the beautifully landscaped yard. You built the decks, assembled the fountain, planted the flowers that bloomed all around us as we sat under the gazebo strung with tiny lights, or sat by the fire in the outdoor fireplace – I had all that, and 10 more years of the same when you replicated our garden paradise here in our Michigan home.

I had our house (our very very very fine house) times two.

I had a man who loved me above all else, who lived to make me happy.

I had a man who danced with me to this song – and so many others – in our kitchen.

Lyrics
I’ll light the fire
You put the flowers in the vase that you bought today

Staring at the fire for hours and hours while I listen to you
Play your love songs all night long for me, only for me

Come to me now and rest your head for just five minutes, everything is good
Such a cozy room, the windows are illuminated by the
Sunshine through them, fiery gems for you, only for you

Our house is a very, very, very fine house with two cats in the yard
Life used to be so hard
Now everything is easy ’cause of you
And our la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Our house is a very, very, very fine house with two cats in the yard
Life used to be so hard
Now everything is easy ’cause of you
And our

I’ll light the fire while you place the flowers in the vase that you bought today

Songwriters: Graham Nash

 

About the author

Katherine Billings Palmer is a technical writer, poet, and essayist from Garden City, Michigan. She’s won several academic writing awards, including first place in the University of Michigan Dearborn Critical Essay Contest for her work about poet John Donne: “‘The Sun Rising’: A Lover’s Boast.”

In 2017, Katherine’s husband, Rick, died of complications from small cell lung cancer. She wrote a series of poems and essays about her struggles to cope with her grief. I Wanted to Grow Old With You is available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle editions.

Her latest book, A Widow’s Words: Grief, Reflection, Prose, and Poetry – The First Year was published in January 2019 and is also available on Amazon.com.

Katherine is a guest blogger for the Hope for Widows Foundation and writes about her grief journey at www.TheWritingWidow.com.

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