You’re supposed to hold me when I’m grieving

You’re supposed to hold me when I’m grieving.

For more than twenty years, your huge warm comforting embrace has been my strength through sadness and despair.

How can I live through losing you?

You were my bulwark.
Your giant strong hands held mine through every loss I suffered, every sadness, every disappointment.

Whose hands will hold mine now?

Your words comforted me through the loss of both my parents, my aunt, our friends, life’s lowest points.
Your encouragement kept me strong when I was at my weakest. Your love embraced me through it all.

How can you be gone? Where will I turn now?

You’re supposed to hold me when I’m grieving,

but now I’m grieving you.

About the author

Katherine Billings Palmer is a technical writer, poet, and essayist from Garden City, Michigan. She’s won several academic writing awards, including first place in the University of Michigan Dearborn Critical Essay Contest for her work about poet John Donne: “‘The Sun Rising’: A Lover’s Boast.”

In 2017, Katherine’s husband, Rick, died of complications from small cell lung cancer. She wrote a series of poems and essays about her struggles to cope with her grief. I Wanted to Grow Old With You is available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle editions.

Her latest book, A Widow’s Words: Grief, Reflection, Prose, and Poetry – The First Year was published in January 2019 and is also available on

Katherine is a guest blogger for the Hope for Widows Foundation and writes about her grief journey at

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