Written at Rick’s bedside, August 13, 2017, 11:58 am

You thought you couldn’t live without your Aunt Pat
You thought you couldn’t live without your mom
You thought you couldn’t live without your dad

And now Rick

It gets harder and harder as people leave you. Your special support system. Those who loved you like no other person ever did.

And I type this on the Chromebook you made me buy. You knew I’d love it, but I resisted. You knew me… You know me better than anyone ever has in my existence. You know every nook and cranny of my mind and body…and soul.

Soulmate is not an abstract concept.

My soul will die without you. I will wither and rot if you aren’t on this journey with me.

You must live. You must.

August 13, 2017, 11:58 am

Rick died at 8:18 pm.

About the author

Katherine Billings Palmer is a technical writer, poet, and essayist from Garden City, Michigan. She’s won several academic writing awards, including first place in the University of Michigan Dearborn Critical Essay Contest for her work about poet John Donne: “‘The Sun Rising’: A Lover’s Boast.”

In 2017, Katherine’s husband, Rick, died of complications from small cell lung cancer. She wrote a series of poems and essays about her struggles to cope with her grief. I Wanted to Grow Old With You is available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle editions.

Her latest book, A Widow’s Words: Grief, Reflection, Prose, and Poetry – The First Year was published in January 2019 and is also available on Amazon.com.

Katherine is a guest blogger for the Hope for Widows Foundation and writes about her grief journey at www.TheWritingWidow.com.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.