AKA "The Writing Woman"
… But some nights, I lie down on my side, pull the covers around me, and put out the light, and I sense him there. It’s not a conscious decision; it just happens. I feel him scooch over next to me from behind and pull me to him, and snuggle up against me. I feel the cocoon of his love, … Read the blog
It’s been fifteen months since my husband died, and I have a question…
What exactly is my allotted grieving time?
Is there a prescribed time limit? Can I access a table of typical grief limits allowed per relationship type? Parent = 9.3 months? Cousin = 4 months? Aunt/uncle = 6.2 months? I can’t even begin to guess the grief time … Read the blog
…After 15 months of widowhood, I’ve pretty much adapted to my current status. And, sometimes, when I take inventory of where my life is headed, now that I’m on my own, I ask myself, Other than the fact that your husband is dead, how do you like your life?
And the answer is – I have a very, very good … Read the blog
… So here I am, with all the usual stress inducers (and more) and no Rick to balance it all out for me. No backrubs. No one to say, “Don’t worry, honey, none of that matters. Let’s take a drive through the park.” I am graced with the support of wonderful friends and family, so I’m not alone. But the … Read the blog
I have a confession to make: I used to complain about my husband.
Yes, I have to admit that Rick, my perfect husband, the man I adored so much in life, was actually not so perfect, after all. And at times, when I was out with friends, or particularly aggravated by some of his failings or bad habits, I bitched … Read the blog
. . .One evening, a couple of months after Rick died, I just couldn’t stand being alone in the house anymore, but I also knew I was not fit company for anyone. I was miserable and sad and lonely, but I was only lonely for Rick, so that also negated the idea of calling a friend or family member. I … Read the blog
Beginning next month, the old company logo at work is being replaced and removed from all our products. Rick created that logo 20 years ago.
I thought, there goes another piece of Rick, his legacy, his mark on the world. And I swallowed the temptation to cry as business continued to be discussed around me.
And the more I contemplate … Read the blog
“It takes a village to raise a child” is a well known African proverb that means child-rearing is a communal effort, that raising a child requires the experience and support of an entire community with whom the child can interact to help him or her learn and grow.
And since the death of my husband last year, I’ve discovered that … Read the blog
My latest post is on Hope for Widows website: In Memoriam: Navigating the Bridge Between “Us” and “Me”
Ever since Rick died, when making decisions or buying something new, I’ve thought in terms of what he would have liked or disliked. I do lots of things “in his memory,” and as the first anniversary of his death approaches, I’m slowly … Read the blog
One of the most difficult and unexpected things I’ve had to cope with in this grieving process is getting used to the quiet, the deafening quiet.
I miss the groans he emitted as he arose from his chair or sat down again – or as he loudly clomped up the basement stairs after getting a can of something from the … Read the blog