I was tidying up the kitchen yesterday, and I reached for the spray bottle of cleaner. I noticed it’s almost empty and reminded myself that I need to add it to my shopping list. Then my mind started its typical chain of thoughts… Rick bought this bottle. He bought a couple of bottles at the same time and this is … Read the blog
The Sounds of Silence: My Latest Post on the Hope for Widows Blog
One of the most difficult and unexpected things I’ve had to cope with in this grieving process is getting used to the quiet, the deafening quiet.
I miss the groans he emitted as he arose from his chair or sat down again – or as he loudly clomped up the basement stairs after getting a can of something from the … Read the blog
See You on the Other Side
I was running late this morning (nothing new about that). But today I was particularly late, and at the time I got in my car and started it up, I’m usually already sitting at my desk at work. I wouldn’t normally have been in the car when this song was playing.
Timing is everything.
So I started my car, and … Read the blog
Alone at the Crossroads
I feel like I’m at some weird crossroads in my life: the intersection of clinging to my life with Rick and forging on to my solo life ahead. My head is filled with conflicting thoughts. The pain, the grief has lessened (most days), and I’ve realized that by living without Rick for nearly ten months, I now feel more like … Read the blog
A lifeline of hope for the newly grieving: It gets better
As someone who has now survived nine months of widowhood, I decided to extend a lifeline of hope for anyone who’s in the first few month of grieving. It’s a surprising realization and something that occurred to me only this morning:
It gets better.
I never would have believed it in the early days – the days, weeks, and months … Read the blog
On Grief and Grandkids: Latest Blog Posted on Hope for Widows
When Rick died suddenly last August, my son Brandon and his wife Lindsey were forced to quickly research the best way to handle explaining his death to my then 2 ½-year-old grandson, Jonas. They didn’t want to confuse him by telling him that his Papa “went away,” because he might think Papa was coming back. They knew he was too … Read the blog
Memorial Day Weekend, 2018 – A Poem
Serenity was a long holiday weekend.
Me floating in my pool
You, off riding your bicycle
Quiet, stillness, lassitude
Relaxed in the giant float I bought on Amazon
Peace and tranquility
Summer and heat and happiness
Floating, floating, floating
Staring up at the blue sky
Leaves and squirrels rustling in the trees
Pure bliss
Alone, yet not lonely
Alive and … Read the blog
I want to keep you alive
I want to keep you alive
I look around me and I see that there’s no way to keep you here, but I’m trying. Life shouts at me, Move on. Move on. Move on…but I don’t want to if that means leaving you behind.
I know I can’t bring you back. I hate that I couldn’t save you, that I … Read the blog
The Legacy of the Do-It-Yourselfer
Dear Rick,
Everything in this house elicits a memory. Absolutely everything.
I just heard the clink of the mailbox as the postman left a delivery. We installed the mailbox. We handpicked the perfect one with the perfect finish that matched the outdoor sconces on the garage. We toted it home in the back of your F150.
On a hot summer … Read the blog
Grief Work: A Job I Didn’t Apply For – New Blog Posted on Hope for Widows.org Website
My latest blog has been posted on Hope for Widows Foundation website. Read it here.
… Read the blog