AKA "The Writing Woman"
I had another slight meltdown today after Lynn left. I didn’t feel like doing anything except sitting in my Rick blanket cocoon. I guess it was because I spent the entire day until 1:30am with others and didn’t have any time to cry.
I thought of Rick several times yesterday. In the movies, he was always next to me. We … Read the blog
I desperately want to turn back time.
I want to relive every moment, good and bad.
I want you here.
I want more time.
I want normal and nothing has been normal since you died.
When you were diagnosed, we knew there was no forever,
but I never really pictured it. It was a vague shadowy future that I dreaded … Read the blog
I was looking for a picture of Rick cooking to go with a blog post. I came across several pictures from Weeki Wachee. We stayed at a motel, loved it, and Rick went to the park to cook food while I worked during the day.
I knew we had some shots of us at the park. We had completely taken … Read the blog
Dear Rick,
I watched Danielle this morning – your job. I got up at 6:30am and, while she watched TV, I went into your office and uploaded MFTH blog pictures – your job.
I drove Danielle to school – your job.
As I was driving down Harrison, I thought how odd it was, this strange loop of life. I used … Read the blog
It’s noon and I’m hungry so I went to find food. I thought I’d take out some frozen chicken and maybe make a stir-fry for dinner.
I found 2 frozen chicken breasts and what looks like frozen steaks. Then I found 2 larger bags, with big cuts of some kind of meat.
I thought, this is ridiculous. It looks dry/frosty, … Read the blog
Dear Rick,
There are so many things that I wish you were here for. I think you would have been pleased to see me out with Cindy and the kids the other night. I think you would be happy that we are doing Thanksgiving together this year, even though you are gone. They are and will be my family forever. … Read the blog
Dear Rick,
I was taking a quick break to read emails between projects at work. One email was about SAE logo merchandise for sale.
I was browsing through the shirts and suddenly flashed back to Florida – you and I in a Walmart. You were buying two or three of those silky zip-up shirts that you liked so much. You … Read the blog
Dear Rick,
Twelve weeks.
This is the longest we’ve been apart since the night we met. How can I go on without you?
I thought the pain might be getting better…that the hole in my heart would start to heal. Scar over.
It’s not happening. It’s getting worse.
Another Sunday morning without you – what do I do? Where do … Read the blog
“A man will never love a woman as much as a woman loves a man.” – A quote from my mother after one of my boyfriends left me when I was in my early twenties.
If my mom were here now, I’d tell her how wrong she was.
Richard Kevin Palmer loved me as much as I loved him. He … Read the blog
There are songs I’ve always liked that take on a whole new meaning now that Rick is gone. It may be wishful thinking, but I feel like he’s still near me, loving me, and I try to do what I think he’d want me to. This song was mentioned on one of the FB widows’ groups, and I gave it … Read the blog